Recollections from The Tatler, Number 181, June 6, 1710, by Richard Steele : Summary And Analysis

Mankind is split into two types. The first group believes that it is the world’s good fortune to have them and make it a point to be noticed. When they fail to draw attention to all their attributes they begin to lose their capability of appreciating life itself and assume that much is lost due to it. The other part spend most of their lives emulating those around them; an act which is as appreciable as the practice of the vulgar. The wise have often excused themselves from time to time to reminisce about their deceased friends and honor the sanctity of this priceless relationship that came to be even with the little time they had. And towards the end of our life there is nothing more gratifying than revisiting those sweet memories of the past, the friends we have had and laughs we have shared.

With the same intention the writer tries to visit his past but is disappointed with his reaction to his losses. He looks at himself with contempt because even though the loss is the same his grief has eroded over time but the pleasure of the pleasant still please the same. Though in nature ‘healing with time’ is a benefit, occasionally it helps to remember the pain. When your temper is all too good it sobers you up and puts on the right track of life. It helps keep both your desire and your disappointments at an arm’s length, thereby lessening the magnitude of effect they have on your life. When you wind up your clock you can’t make an instant correction, you have to go a whole circle before you set it right. And that’s what the writer wants to do now, speak of his every sorrow, right from the first instance of pain to the most hurtful and recent.

The first sense of sorrow the writer ever felt was when his father died. He was 4 years old then and was rather amazed by the demeanor of his family and couldn’t understand why no one was playing with him. When he went room where his father’s coffin lay, he saw his mom weeping and forgot all about the battledore (a precursor to tennis) in his hands and tried to get his father out of the coffin. (How he knew his father was in there perplexes him.) His mother almost snapped out of her world of grief and held him tightly in her arms and told him that his papa was never coming back; he was now gone, never to return. She was a beautiful woman, a noble spirit and there was dignity in her grief. It was her stumbling to come terms with reality that got to the writer. He for the first time realized how vulnerable his heart was and how it would always be haunted by the impending pains of life. Any influence of stimuli of this kind to a child’s mind is like a birth mark, never to be lost. The writer claims that the goodness in him is not a merit of his; he was bound to be that way. It was his mother’s tears caused by a pain unknown to him, (thus leaving him in no position to shield himself from the ache) that lead to his immense compassion. He has since then been trapped in plenty of disasters because of his nature. These instances of pain have served him no good except give him a truck load of bitter sweet memories and acquaint him with human weakness.

The misfortunes of our youth are often more clearer in our memories and that’s why he recalls the lost companions of his youth immediately. The unexpected deaths are mourned the most because we as human beings never truly accept that there is only one constant in every future; death.

And so we whine in life lamenting those lost. Every instance that we remember arouses different emotions all dependent on the circumstance we are in. Nobody in the army can sit and ponder about the men lost in a serious hour. In a time of crisis they are just not in a position to accept that they are being cursed every day by a widow or an orphan because they fell prey to the ambitions of a tyrant. But the valiant men are more deserving of our reverence than our pity and it is their disdain for death that comforts us. It lets us know that there is no evil in the world that is welcome even when it is all for a cause. Yet when we remove the filter of nobility we can’t help but feel pity for all those innocent lives lost.

The writer goes on to say that he runs short of words with the tenderness necessary to express the pain he wants to. He then speaks of his first love and his next loss. She was a beautiful virgin, who had no understanding of her charms and was effortlessly excellent. He says that it is fair for death to have a claim upon the bold, the ambitious, the high and the haughty; all people who had their fair share of success in life and some corrupted by it. But how is it fair to cut short the life of the meek, powerless and naïve; who have yet to discover the essence of life? Nothing can erase her from his memories, not time, not work, not pain. He saw her dressed for a ball and in a shroud in the same week. Saw her in all glory and then to bid adieu. How demented must death be to act as frivolously as to steal his love and then gift him a long hearty life! Just as the writer starts to recollect more of such painful memories his servant interrupts the process by bringing him a letter and a wine hamper along with it. This was the same kind of wine that was to be on sale at Garraway’s coffee house on the next Thursday. (This maybe something of a promotional run, not that it’s important). On receiving the wine he sent for three of his friends, they were close enough to just enjoy each other’s presence. For the four of them companionship took precedence over simple merry making. And the wine for was perfect for them cause it warmed the heart without firing the blood; it gave comfort but not impel (drive) them to act out. They went on to drink about till 2 in the night and almost drank two bottles each and though the night was vague it was something invaluable to hold on to. It was a memory to be cherished.

If any of you have any further doubts feel free to leave it in the comments and I'll get back to you in a day's time. 

If you are satisfied with my interpretation, please do check out the rest of my work.

Toodles :D

Little Things

Not the one direction “little things”, I mean life’s little things. You know what, that’s an inappropriate title cause I actually want to talk about the big things in life that grow to be little. Just keep reading. I promise I am not going insane! J

 When I was in first grade we used to live opposite this grocery store. It was the typical 1990s Indian store with a metal box that had a glass lid and loads of chocolates in it. At that point of time the costliest chocolate there cost about 20 rupees. And it was something that only the most affluent people could buy or at least that’s how it seemed. I remember feeling a sharp pang of envy every time I saw someone buy a box of it and I promised myself that someday I’ll grow big enough to buy a truck load of them. [That day is yet to come ;) Let’s just move on.] But today my life’s different. We are better off and so now all I check is the expiry date. Albeit that is a good turn of events, it just isn’t the same anymore. An aisle full of chocolates no longer excites a girl who yearned for a tiny box of it. And that to me is really, really sad.

It’s unfair for that to happen, for you to stop appreciating those seemingly big things, for them to become trivial. I know it’s a cycle, that there will always be something else that you want but why is life twisted enough to make little of our big things? Why is it that we forget our promises of being eternally grateful for our first pair of good sneakers? Why is the fulfillment of wishes also the end of them?

It’s only logical for us to fight to be better, to forget past victories and look for new ones. But I often wonder, wouldn’t life be so much easier if we could relish the past and seek the future side by side?

I know it’s hard to look at the bright side when you hit a wall but at the very least look back; look at the last wall you scaled or broke through or something! And remember doubting yourself then; remember making it through and believe you are capable of doing the same, even now.

At the end of the day the little things do matter, they make the biggest differences. Don’t let your new goals usurp the positions of the ones you achieved, just find new places for them.

 So never ever forget how it felt when the first plant (you didn’t kill) flowered, how it felt the first time you swam the whole lap, how it felt to spend your first salary on that mint conditioned action figure, how it felt when you found the perfect hair product, how it felt when your biggest wishes came true. Cause these are the things that are truly worth remembering even with retrograde amnesia.

So, I’d like to give a shout out to Tejashree, the first person to follow my blog. I hope that I never forget the joy you gave me! I hope that I break the curse, that someday if I have pool in my house I actually use it and when its warmth comforts me I hope I remember how chilly the community pool water felt in the winter. I hope to be thankful; eternally.

                

Plans & Plans & More Plans

Bad day, horrible day actually and I am tired of bottling it all up. “It’s just your hormones, a rational you would not react this way”, I am tired of telling myself that, so I decided I would rant.

Nah! Just kidding.      

         

“What will you do when the two of you go off to different colleges?”, she asked smirking.

We just smiled. We had decided that we’ll only go to the same place. The joke was on her; or so we thought. She knew better cause she had been handling hormonal bffs for most of her career.

Fast forward 5 months and here we are. I am whiling away my gap year and my bestie is in a college miles and miles away. It seems like a life time ago that we were discussing about how we’ll share our closet in college. As you can see that is not a problem anymore……………

So why do we plan? Why do we try to contain the unpredictable within our predictions? Why not ‘not want things’ rather than ‘not get things’?

We plan because that’s all you can do about it. You prep the best you can for the next moment so you have a contingency plan. It is like performing a controlled experiment in unknown conditions and hoping that your hypothesis is right. And it’s almost always wrong, but it’s better to be wrong than to not know what to do. It’s better to be heartbroken than have nothing to live for. It’s like learning to cycle, the first time you fall off you promise yourself that you will never get on that death machine again. But the shiny two wheeler is too hard to resist. You get the analogy right? Your plans mostly keep failing you, hurting you but you make them any way so that someday you get better at it.

My bestie and I have now planned to be business associates in the future. Who knows if that will work out? However the plan gives us solace and for now, that’s all that matters.

The next and the only thing to do is cross your fingers and wish for the right thing to happen. Your fate no matter where, will lead you to the right place. Or so we pray.

That’s how all of our lives are going to be. Screw the fact that you are perennially putting off that guitar class. The important thing is that you plan to do it. So you’ll never run out of things to do. Cause that would be truly frightening.

Should I kill myself?

Should I kill myself?

Do I deserve to die?

When will the pain end?

Why does this happen to me? Why me?

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No, no and we’ll never know.

I have never met a person who has truly belonged; who has never once shed a tear and it’s safe to say I never will. And still there are 7 billion people on earth struggling to live through the day whether it’s in an I.C.U or in a plush bungalow in Los Angeles. But if you are reading this you are probably questioning your existence, you want to know if the struggle and the pain is worth it. You want to know if a slit on the wrist will make it all better. You want to know things that nobody has answers for.

You don’t want to live but you want to know if dying is okay, if that will be it. If wiping of your existence will make it all better. No, it won’t. Nothing will change except for the fact that you quit and for once people will not be able to pick on you for that. But oblivion is not worth that relief.

Remember the first episode of House M.D; his patient wanted to die with dignity and he tells her that there is no such thing. When you are dead you are just decaying bio-waste, that’s not dignity, that’s not relief, that’s not redemption that’s just nothing. And trust me nothing in this world is worth that pain. Living with no friends, an abusive parent, no hope; the pain they have in store for you is nothing compared to what you are doing to yourself.

I have lived with all that and more. I stuck around. I cried myself to sleep but always made sure I got up the next morning. I tried to look beyond the horizon and now that I am here I know it’s all worth it. Sure I write a blog that no one reads. I am a self declared “great writer”, but even with no appreciation from anyone I am okay. I am okay with almost nothing because I get to write and that’s what I want to do for the rest of my life. All this because I lived, cause I didn’t pop those pills in, cause I didn’t pick up that blade.

When you are dead and gone forever, sure your parents will grieve for the rest of their lives but soon no one will remember you or care about your story. And that as I said is a shitty thing.
On the contrary if you are alive you possess the power to change all that. Sure, everything is pretty bad now but there has to be a way to change it. Maybe you don't see hope today but the fact remains that tomorrow might be that day but if you don't stick around you will never know.

 Work for the things you love, dabble with your passions. (p.s. I won't believe you if you say there is nothing you are passionate about, maybe you just don't want admit that you love something so much so as to live in this big bad world and fight for it.) But believe me it’s worth the fight.

Okay maybe you don't make it big for the next few years but you have got to give credence to the fact that it could happen eventually. And even if it doesn’t, even if you live an average life, it doesn’t matter. Cause as long as you are alive you can at least try to be happy. It really doesn’t matter if you work at a gas station or a M.N.C; if you have a family to go home to or not because to keep you happy you only need you. Do your time on earth J and let time run its course cause the possibility of fulfillment is definitely worth it.

Remember Harland Sanders was 62 years old when the first franchise of KFC came to be. If he had given up when he was sixteen he wouldn't have been a millionaire and the world wouldn't have gotten such great fried chicken.

So push a little more, live a little longer and who knows you might be one of the greatest people to ever walk earth.

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And guys if you want to talk to someone, I am always here. You could leave a comment or get in touch with me at this email id anonymousteen10@gmail.com.  All you need to get through is you and just in case you need some comforting, your friend is just a mail away. Be a fighter, be there. It’s worth it, I promise.

I.E Part II

“Promise you will look for happiness, find happiness; promise that you will move on, promise……………”

How many of us actually mean that? At least not me, I wouldn’t want someone to move on so easily when I begin, to cease, to exist. I would want them to be unable of envisioning a world without me. Most of us would want that; hell, all of us would want that!

But why? What if they care, what if they don’t? What difference will seven billion lit candles make?

You are dead, right?

So what should you care about when it comes to death?

Before that, let us properly analyze this full stop thing. Is it being dead that you are afraid of? No, it is the dying part that frightens you & me. Will it be painful, fast, slow, will I not know, will I have time to plan, to exclude my horrible sibling from my will, will I have time to do all that I have to? The answer to the last question is a no and that, I know for sure. There is no bucket list in this world that has been completely ticked off. But the important thing in life is that you persevere, to tick off as many as you can in the little time that you do have.

So, don’t care about how many will be grief stricken when you die; cause you never stick around long enough to find that out. So what should you care about? Give yourself just one job to do: Find as much happiness as you can for yourself and the people around you. Do that till your day comes and then you will be able to stare death in its face and say, “meh, I had my days J.”

As a wise person once told me” You need make a conscious effort to be happy cause it’s your job, your job alone……………..”

It will never be enough but it can be good enough………………………

[P.S: the wise person is me & love you S.S ]

"My Choice"

According to the U.N, women's empowerment has five components: 

·         Women’s sense of self-worth;

·         Their right to have and to determine choices;

·         Their right to have access to opportunities and resources;

·         Their right to have the power to control their own lives, both within and outside the home;

·         Their ability to influence the direction of social change to create a more just social and economic orders, nationally and internationally. 

Indian women have the same rights as far as her choices agree with mine. A patriarchal society decides what you get to do and what you don’t; what’s the big deal with that? People get murdered every day so your freedom is not a top priority right now, so sit tight. We will get back to you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

This is our reality and the little sparks that can actually make a difference we criticize. For instance “My Choice”. 8 million views and most of us didn't even get the point.

Let’s be honest it doesn't really cover every aspect of women empowerment. But what little they said was damn important. And nobody paid attention because everybody was busy lodging their complaint against sex outside of marriage and the rest of the message just went way over most people’s head.

So through this post I would like to discuss why a small so called offensive phrase caused a nationwide attention deficit and what certain smart people made out from the video.

My body, my mind, my choice that is all it is. It doesn't endorse anything else. It just states the obvious choices that there are. It never tells or asks you to have sex outside of marriage, not have a child or come home at four in the morning. It just tells that these are options that have eternally been available to your male counterpart and if you want to do that, it is all right. After all every rule should apply to the whole species right?

As for infidelity why is it that when the husband is at fault you forgive and forget and if you were ever to do the same it is the biggest crime ever. Don’t you think that if you had the same kind of liberties, your partner would be a lot more careful with his choices? And in the end, men if you are devoted husbands who get cheated on by their wives just get a divorce. Why the ruckus?

The liberty to dress as you like doesn't necessarily translate into everyone walking around naked. It just means that I, a woman, get to wear what I am comfortable in whether it is cargo pants or a saree. My own school had a dress code that banned wearing full length jeans and the recommended choice, a saree. Well guess what, I am not comfortable with my stomach showing, now wouldn't a proper T-shirt be less revealing? And why the hell do boys get to wear jeans for the same occasion? They don’t exactly have to wear a saree but a traditional sherwani dress code would have been fair. But that is exactly what our society isn't; it just isn't fair to us women.

We are more comfortable with our boys being out at odd times and with girls it is the “log kya kahenge?” that worries us more than their safety (which is something that we should have ensured). And an Indian women’s only job isn't the propagation of her species or getting married. She has a life which comes filled with her ambitions and if having a child or getting married is not a priority; it just isn't.

There is other important stuff to speak about but that doesn't make this less important. We can’t really wait for every woman to get educated before we fight for her right to make her own choices especially when it is about her own body.

I don’t know if vogue made this video solely for publicity or not but I do agree with what they said. Watch the video, just once more and this time pay attention to other parts.

These are few things that struck a chord with me:

·         Trying to trap my soul is to believe you can halt the expansion of the universe

·         Your mind is caged, let it free. My body is not, let it be.

·         You are my choice; I am not your privilege.

·         My choices are like my finger prints they make me unique.

For once sit back and think of what you liked about the video.

Respect her and her choices cause there is a reason why she is your better half.

Leave comments and we can have a sensible debate.

Fun&Hacks

4 days ago

+Anony Mous Enjoy slut enjoy your life!

Please be more civilized than that. And of course my answer to that was as follows:

Anony Mous

3 days ago

+Fun&Hacks never asked for ur permission; why don't u invest ur energy in something productive like jumping of a bridge or getting psychiatric treatment? :D 

Some Great Advice By a Local Daily

Ensure you have had a French toast or something...................


After being enlightened got around to some long postponed educational activities.

Some serious maths............

and some fine particulates that can cause breathing!!!!????????????

TOODLES!