Mankind is split into two types. The first group believes
that it is the world’s good fortune to have them and make it a point to be
noticed. When they fail to draw attention to all their attributes they begin to
lose their capability of appreciating life itself and assume that much is lost
due to it. The other part spend most of their lives emulating those around
them; an act which is as appreciable as the practice of the vulgar. The wise
have often excused themselves from time to time to reminisce about their
deceased friends and honor the sanctity of this priceless relationship that
came to be even with the little time they had. And towards the end of our life
there is nothing more gratifying than revisiting those sweet memories of the
past, the friends we have had and laughs we have shared.
With the same intention the writer tries to visit his past
but is disappointed with his reaction to his losses. He looks at himself with
contempt because even though the loss is the same his grief has eroded over
time but the pleasure of the pleasant still please the same. Though in nature
‘healing with time’ is a benefit, occasionally it helps to remember the pain.
When your temper is all too good it sobers you up and puts on the right track
of life. It helps keep both your desire and your disappointments at an arm’s
length, thereby lessening the magnitude of effect they have on your life. When
you wind up your clock you can’t make an instant correction, you have to go a
whole circle before you set it right. And that’s what the writer wants to do
now, speak of his every sorrow, right from the first instance of pain to the most
hurtful and recent.
The first sense of sorrow the writer ever felt was when his
father died. He was 4 years old then and was rather amazed by the demeanor of
his family and couldn’t understand why no one was playing with him. When he
went room where his father’s coffin lay, he saw his mom weeping and forgot all
about the battledore (a precursor to tennis) in his hands and tried to get his
father out of the coffin. (How he knew his father was in there perplexes him.)
His mother almost snapped out of her world of grief and held him tightly in her
arms and told him that his papa was never coming back; he was now gone, never
to return. She was a beautiful woman, a noble spirit and there was dignity in
her grief. It was her stumbling to come terms with reality that got to the
writer. He for the first time realized how vulnerable his heart was and how it
would always be haunted by the impending pains of life. Any influence of
stimuli of this kind to a child’s mind is like a birth mark, never to be lost.
The writer claims that the goodness in him is not a merit of his; he was bound
to be that way. It was his mother’s tears caused by a pain unknown to him,
(thus leaving him in no position to shield himself from the ache) that lead to
his immense compassion. He has since then been trapped in plenty of disasters
because of his nature. These instances of pain have served him no good except
give him a truck load of bitter sweet memories and acquaint him with human
weakness.
The misfortunes of our youth are often more clearer in our
memories and that’s why he recalls the lost companions of his youth
immediately. The unexpected deaths are mourned the most because we as human
beings never truly accept that there is only one constant in every future;
death.
And so we whine in life lamenting those lost. Every instance
that we remember arouses different emotions all dependent on the circumstance
we are in. Nobody in the army can sit and ponder about the men lost in a
serious hour. In a time of crisis they are just not in a position to accept
that they are being cursed every day by a widow or an orphan because they fell
prey to the ambitions of a tyrant. But the valiant men are more deserving of
our reverence than our pity and it is their disdain for death that comforts us.
It lets us know that there is no evil in the world that is welcome even when it
is all for a cause. Yet when we remove the filter of nobility we can’t help but
feel pity for all those innocent lives lost.
If any of you have any further doubts feel free to leave it in the comments and I'll get back to you in a day's time.
If you are satisfied with my interpretation, please do check out the rest of my work.
Toodles :D
Opinion or goal of essayist towards writing this essay should remain here
ReplyDeleteIs it the text of recollection.
ReplyDeleteNope
DeleteIt's the summary or you can say simplified version of the text.
Nice explanation
ReplyDelete👌👌👌
ReplyDeleteI could not find any explanation or research paper or book for this essay. You have very finely and lucidly explained the such a difficult essay by Steele. I feel indebted for this.
ReplyDeletethank you!
I could not understand what you mean by your title "anonymity the most associable identity." Could you explain it, please?
ReplyDelete